“R.I.P.D.,” a new fantasy action adventure opens this week, but unfortunately, this one is strictly D.O.A.

Ryan Reynolds plays Nick, a Boston cop who has made a poor call – boosting some gold found during a drug bust along with his partner Hayes, played by Kevin Bacon.  Shortly after he decides to come clean, Nick is murdered while on duty and before you can say, “Who you gonna call,” he is drafted into the “Rest in Peace Department”. The R.I.P.D. is made up of dead lawmen that trade 100 years of service to divine justice in return for dispatching “dead-Os” (dead spirits) to their final, fiery rewards. (Don’t worry, I’m not giving too much away – this all happens in the first 5 minutes).

Nick is partnered up with Roy(Jeff Bridges), a lawman from the 1800s. And a demon busting odd couple is born.

“R.I.P.D.” was adapted from a 1999 four-issue comic, and I have to assume the comics were funny and entertaining. I’m assuming that, because the movie is neither. R.I.P.D. is essentially “Men in Black” without the wit, the style, and the script.  In an attempt to boost box office receipts, the film was held back from release a couple of years ago, so it could be “converted” to 3D. I like to think of this as “fake” 3D. Trust me, it didn’t help.

Bridges basically plays Roy as Rooster Cogburn, muttering his lines unintelligibly. Perhaps he’s asking his agent to get him out of the picture. I have to assume that some sort of blackmail was involved to get Reynolds and Bacon to participate. Neither of them seems particularly pleased to be there.

Even the combined talents of Reynolds, Bridges and Bacon can’t breathe life into R.I.P.D. It doesn’t stand a ghost of a chance at the Box Office.

The Bottom Line: Try renting any of the “Men in Black” films, or better yet, “Ghostbusters.” “R.I.P.D.” isn’t worth a D.A.M.N.

Rated PG-13 for violence, sci-fi/fantasy action, some sensuality, and language including sex references. 96 minutes.

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