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I have seen the future, and it is dingy. The latest incarnation of Superman offers a very dark take on the DC Comics Hero. Maybe someone should have told director, Zach Snyder (“300″) that Superman should be full of light… and truth… and justice… and you know the rest.

Isn’t Batman supposed to be the Gothic, brooding superhero?

I’ve had a thing for Superman since I was a little kid. My dad gave me a quarter to buy a comic book, and instead of getting a Little Lulu like my girlfriends, I bought my first Superman comic. That was it for me. I’ve loved the superhero and his mild-mannered counterpart throughout the intervening years.

We all know the story… boy comes to earth… learns he has extraordinary powers. As a young man, he journeys to discover where he came from and what he was sent here to do. But the hero in him must emerge if he is to save the world from annihilation and become the symbol of hope for all mankind… yada… yada…yada…

Superman has been done, and done well, from the delightfully corny 50’s TV show, to the earnest and winning movie “Superman” – starring the late Christopher Reeve – the 90′s series “Lois and Clark”, and even the fairly recent TV series “Smallville.” So what’s wrong with “Man of Steel”?

Unfortunately, more than is right.

Remember those Pin Point Impression thingies that were on every executive desk in the 90s? You pushed your hand or face into them and ended up with a metal impression of your face, or your hand or… whatever. The fad wore out and they were discarded, but evidently they banded together and formed into the planet Krypton. Along with the metal filings and globs of mercury you stuck magnets into when you were a kid. (It was before we knew playing with mercury was a bad idea.) Yep, Krypton looks like metal impression pins and liquid mercury. Is it any wonder the planet was destroyed?

Instead of the usual brief prelude of Krypton imploding and Kal-el (i.e. Superman’s Dad, Academy Award® winner, Russell Crowe) giving the kid the quick sendoff-to-earth-in-a-tiny-spaceship scene, the opening of “Man of Steel” offers more than 30 minutes of metal filings and mercury blobs blowing up. Oh yeah, and filmdom’s new go-to, creepy bad guy, Michael Shannon (“Boardwalk Empire”) as General Zod, enemy of well, basically everyone except his henchmen.

What I’m saying here is head on out to the lobby and take your sweet time getting your popcorn, ‘cause this movie isn’t getting started for half an hour. And once it finally gets going, forget any expectations of a linear storyline – “Steel” skips back and forth between Clark brooding and searching Earth for his special purpose – to Clark as a kid in Kansas trying to hide his superness – to Superman facing down the bad guys.

Now, the good news: Henry Cavill (“The Tudors”) is a perfectly fine Superman – a bit broody for my taste – but perfectly fine, and four-time Oscar® nominee Amy Adams is terrific as Lois Lane (no surprise there.) And Michael Shannon is über creepy. And the end of the film makes me think that the sequel might actually be worth watching.

The bottom line is “Man of Steel” has been made for an audience that plays “Worlds of Warcraft”. And that audience will love it and box offices everywhere will rejoice throughout the land. Me, not so much. I wanted to take some Windex and a rag and clean the lens off.

The Bottom Line: If you can forget everything you’ve ever known about Superman, or if dark, brooding superheroes are your thing, you’ll love “Man of Steel.” Otherwise, leave it to the youngsters.

PG-13, 2 hr. 23 min. ★★★★★★

Welcome to “Google Crashers 2.0″

Sometimes it just feels good to have a few belly laughs and light moments amidst the noisy summer blockbusters. “The Internship”, delivers plenty of laughs, as well as a scenario many of us can relate to.

When sales reps Billy (Vince Vaughn) Nick (Owen Wilson) learn that their business (selling watches) has folded, they realize their 20 something year careers have been demolished by the digital world. (Even their boss’s 70-year-old secretary gets the time from her cell phone.) But, after all, a sales rep’s best tool is the ability to talk people into something, and after Googling a job search and getting no results, they manage to talk their way into coveted internships at… Google. However, gaining entrance to this utopia is only half the battle. The rest is having to compete with a group of the nation’s most elite and wily 22-year-old, tech-savvy geniuses in order to prove that necessity really is the mother of re-invention.

Never underestimate the power of Vince Vaughn. He may be a one trick pony – but it’s a pretty entertaining trick, and Vaughn and Wilson (who also co-starred in the highly successful “Wedding Crashers) have their patter and rhythm nailed. It doesn’t hurt that Vaughn wrote the story and co-authored the screenplay with Jared Stern. And while the basic fish-out-of-water concept isn’t new, Vaughn and company have put a smart spin on things by setting the scene at the “Googleplex” – Google’s Mountain View Campus, where most of the exterior scenes were shot. This is really taking product placement to a whole new level.

Google was ranked the number 1 Best Company to Work For in 2012 by Fortune Magazine, and “The Internship” does nothing to dispel that image. According to the company site, “The Googleplex is home to scores of buildings, each with its own personality. With hundreds of bikes and scooters at our disposal, getting around campus is easy. There’s beach volleyball, a bowling alley, a climbing wall, over 25 cafeterias (all food is free), more than 100 micro-kitchens and seven fitness centers.” The movie doesn’t have to exaggerate much to make “Googlyness” look pretty amazing. Do Google Interns actually play Quiddich? Probably not, but it makes for some very funny moments. You’ll have to see the human Golden Snitch to believe it.

Can you imagine how many resumes the Google Human Resources department will get this summer?

When it comes to current buddy movie teams, Vaughn and Wilson are at the top of the class. Solid performances from the “kids” include the team leader, played by Josh Brener , and Max Minghella as the evil leader of the opposing team. There are also nice turns from Aasif Mandvi and Josh Gad (“Book of Mormon.”)

Watch for a couple of cameos from Will Farrell (uncredited) and Rob Riggles, as well as two blink-and-you’ll-miss-them bits from Google co-founder, Sergey Brin.

Of course in addition to the laugh out loud moments, there are plenty of feel good scenes. In this case the film may actually provide a good stepping off point for some good discussions with your children and grandchildren. “Education? Experience? Discuss.”

The Bottom Line: A nice way to spend a couple of hours in an air conditioned theater, and a good date movie. Maybe even better to wait until the DVD comes out, or it’s on HBO.

MPGA Rating PG13 for sexuality, some crude humor, partying and language. 119 minutes. Rating: ★★★★★★